I’m stuck (blog not poem)

Why is it that I can’t get my head out of the swirling black hole that is enveloping me?  I know that there is a life I want that will never exist, but I just can’t seem to let go of that little flicker, that little chance in hell, that one day all I dream will come true.  I hate every part of my being and imagine myself in this other life the way I want to exist and look and feel – maybe that is why I just won’t let go… if I remain in this life as I am today, then I’ll be sick and miserable until the end of my short days… I imagine that if I can attain this other life, I’ll somehow be magically transformed into this being that is in tune with everyone and everything around her, someone that is healthy – someone that is happy.

And so I end this blog now.  I’ll have that tickle in the back of my screwed up head and scarred heart until the end of my short days.

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2 Responses to “I’m stuck (blog not poem)”

  1. I can’t seem to cough up the feather either, RED. ❤ Your words speak to me and make me feel someone might actually understand me for the first REAL time in my life.

    • Blood Red Says:

      Awwww…. thx chicky! I guess it’s good we don’t get that feeling coughed up; otherwise, hope may be lost 🙂 Love you bunches! ❤

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